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May 29, 2009

Real Cougars Do Want Great Sex After 50

Can you have hot sex forever? No problem—just stick to a careful diet, regular Pilates and the miracles of modern medicine. At least that's the message we're getting from the recent burst of celebrity cougar mania and new advertising campaigns from pharmaceutical companies promising that hormones will restore our aging bodies to their former glory. But is it reasonable for women over 50 to expect the same level of sexual satisfaction and drive as a 25-year-old? And is this what women really want?
 
Those opening lines came from a Newsweek article written by Barbara Kantrowitz and Pat Wingert.  Check it out for yourself.  
 
Bertinelli Ladies, in my opinion, that is exactly what women really want. It may take a little more effort to embrace the finer things in life after 50, but the juice is well worth the squeeze. 
 
They go on to say, "our role models are women like the experienced stars of "Sex and the City,"enjoying their time beneath the sheets." And then there are those photos of newly svelte Valerie Bertinelli (49) flaunting her toned abs in a bikini. We admire these women for getting out there (especially Bertinelli), who looks incredible".

I love this part of the article the best. What's needed is a reasonable balance between old-fashioned stereotypes and modern hype, combined with a new understanding of what sex means to women of "a certain age." By the time they reach their late 40s or early 50s, women should be savvy enough to know that feeling sexy is a state of mind, and that a good man doesn't need a partner to look perfect in lingerie in order for her to be desirable.  Isn't that what all of us Real Cougars believe?

They end with this.  The bottom line? A happy sex life after 50 is still very possible, but you have to make an effort. Feeling good in your own skin and being open-minded and creative are what sexy is all about.  Our personal favorite role model is actress Helen Mirren, still sexy and glorious and proudly 63. And—by the way—still rocking a bikini.

Nice work ladies.  Keep writing more of these upbeat articles.


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Comments

I really feel sex is better now that I am 49.I was so insecure when I was younger. Every little thing bothered me. You have to realize that sex is mostly mental. You have to have a partner that turns you on. If not, he could have a photographic memory of the Kama Sutra in his mind and you won't feel anything.I'm getting what I want out of sex. It took a little longer than it should have but it is wonderful.

I know that sex has improved greatly with becoming older, I would hope that even into my 50's I will be having great sex. As I have matured I have become more comfortable in my own skin. I also work harder now to keep in shape and flexible. I wear clothing that makes me feel sexier. When I was in my twenties it was easy to feel sexy regardless what I was wearing, but as we age we begin to see ourselves as mothers and grandmothers and the psychological effects that has on our libidos is not always healthy. When I turned 40 I took a long hard look in the mirror and realized that I had the body of a woman, my hips were curved, my breast had a natural sag and my skin wasn't as youthful as it once had been but I decided this is the hand I was dealt and I was going to make the best of it. Since then I have come to terms with my body. I am sexy, alive and intelligent. Who could ask for more. I love telling people my age and watching the shock on their faces. I may be in my 40's but I wear it extremely well. A 23 year old male told my husband last night he was a very lucky man. He has a beautiful wife who knows what she wants and isn't afraid to ask for it. Sexy is simply a state of mind, if you believe you are sexy you are. The 23 year old said he deals with 20 year old daily who either don't know what they want or won't ask for it out of insecurity. I count my blessing daily for being my age. I have survived the worst and now am enjoying the best. I believe sex gets better with age. We learn to accept our imperfections and revel in them. We learn what makes us feel good and if we are lucky enough to be in a healthy relationship share that with our partner. Women come in all shapes and sizes, there is a reason, the stick figures that we idealize as a society are not attractive to all men. My husband loves the fact that I have curves. He enjoys the fact that my body is soft in all the right places and calls me his curvy country road. An enjoyable trip for a long lazy Sunday afternoon, or any time we can catch a moment in our hectic lives. I have no problem being my age. I love being my age, and I am looking forward to continuing to grow as a human being and enjoying sex is simply part of the bigger package.

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